♥ Friday, June 25, 2010
ok. 1 last post before i head to bkk. (:
but if im able to get wifi in the hotel. i will try to blog sth.
got to wake up at 3.45am as we will be leaving the hse at 4am.
having breakfast with the gang ! <3
anyway, im putting so much hope onto this trip.
every1 told me. an overseas trip usually stregthen your r/s
and im kindda glad. the time is just nice.
before his love for me decrease. gonna shower him lotsa love.
I nv imagined i would fall so deep for him.
he meant so much to me. so much till i cant give him up just like that.
so yup. i hope he will be touched by my actions (:
Did a card for him and even bought him the couple HP strap.
( cos i quarrelled with him and den broke his :x )
This trip means alot to me. and i dun wanna screw things up. *cross fingers*
Loved ♥
♥ Thursday, June 24, 2010
I dunno how i shd do things now.
by holding him tightly, im afraid he would leave me cos im suffocating him.
if i let him have the freedom he wants, im afraid he will leave me cos he finds some1 else.
can some1 tell me what i shd do ?
I dun used to hold him so tight. but den, things happened.
and i changed. cos im afraid. i love him.
at this moment of time. i dunno what to do/dont do.
1 year ago, i told myself i have to pull it through with him till he ord.
but now.. i really wish to turn back time.
and start everything again.
i wanna save this r/s but i dunno what i can do.
suggestions from frens are :
fight for wad you want.( i want to, but how ?)
find some1 else i deserve some1 better.(why would i want to find some1 better ? when i feel happy being with him ?)
give him what he wants.( i want to. but can you understand my fear ?)
if he is yours, he will come back to you. ( and what if cos i dun care, that makes him not come back ?)
stay strong/ be strong ( i am tryin, but the thought of it just breaks me apart)
some1 else love me more den he does ( i am happy beign with him. i wan no1 else.)
but whatever it is. im willing to fight for this.
its my happiness, and i dun wanna lose it.
Loved ♥
♥ Wednesday, June 23, 2010
I dunno how you can just act as thou nth happened.
I feel so miserable. I dunno what to do.
This feeling I thought I will nv need to experience it again
But I was wrong. 3 days before our 1st anniversary you told me those words.
I feel so so terrible.
I have so many questions in my mind..
How come the truth always hurt so much ?
Can we actually make things better again ?
Are you able to accept my flaws ? And vice versa ?
I depended so much on you. We started off being such a lovely couple.
And now, I'm confused.
I dunno what I shd do anymore. I really wanna try.
But I dunno how. I doubt I can be myself anymore.
Will you please love me like you did ?
Loved ♥
♥ Monday, June 21, 2010
Its Monday again :/
Weekends seem to pass real quick.
guess fun times always end fast.
5 more days and i will be on the plane to BKK.
i am looking forward to this exciting trip.
I hope this would be a memorable trip.
Im expecting the worst to happen after this.
I hope my feelings are wrong.
but somehow, it always turn out right.
I just wish to keep all happy memories, and if we do leave each other.
Memories is the best gift you have given me.
Been really paranoid and sensitive towards everything recently.
kindda realise lotsa things have been changed.
you dun seem to be like last time.
I keep telling myself cos you are busy with work.
and by de time you get home, you are tired.
you have been trying to assure me you do still LOVE me.
and i know you do. just dunno when will de day be when you stop.
I hope it wont. but den who knows wad will happen in future.
its also our First Anniversary.
im expecting sth frm you.
thou i know it couldnt happen. but after that night 6 mths back.
i wished it would happen again. oh god !
*I will wait for you till you finish school.
Our R/S started on a rocky path. Guess it will end up better ?
Lets hope so.
Loved ♥
♥ Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Lack of updates and all.
I haven been home for like a week ++
Mon- went for interview in the afternoon.
and den headed to Woodlands to find Christina.
prepared and all.
Bus-ed to Vivo. it was a 1 hr 30 mins ride.
my butt hurts like hell.
met Sweetheart & Benedict.
had Carl's Jr for dinner
went to get Travis's Birthday Pressy.
den Sweetheart drove us back.
watched Prince of Persia. and i totally dun understand de movie.
after awhile. went home to get clothes. and slept.
Tue- Christina came over to Sweetheart's place
cos she was stuck outside class.
headed to town to get my Chanel Necklace fixed.
will only be done in 1 week or 2 weeks time. ):
did a little shopping.
GSS ! there isnt much stuffs. didnt see anything that attracts me also.
train-ed home. and had dinner at KFC in JP with the Tai Family.
Wed- I wanna just do nth, but send resume and watch my Gossip Girls.
keep sayin i wanna watch but till now.
I still haven watch ):
Weekends for this week and next will be packed !
Fri(18/06)-Lunched with the Tai family at Mandarin hotel (not confirm)
I cant rmb wad we were suppose to do for the night.
Sat(19/06)- Travis's First Birthday at Downtown.
Clubbing after that.
Sun(20/06)- we shd be resting. too many activities le.
Father's day dinner with the Tai family ?
Fri(25/06)- Celebration of Our Anniversary.
Sat(26/06)- BKK till 29th !
I pray God will let my plans flow properly, and den i wont spoil any of it. (:
Loved ♥
♥ Friday, June 11, 2010
oh. just to add on.
today Sweetheart is gettin his PINK I.C.
after 2 years of getting tied down to serve the country.
he finally gets his freedom back.
CONGRATS Sweetheart ♥
you are still loved by me (:
shall look forward to our BKK trip.
its als our 1st Anniversary !
hope that it will be a blast !
Loved ♥
♥
Its Friday already..
i realise.. ever since i stopped working.
time have been passing super fast !
and after almost 2 mths of break.
i guess i need to get back to work already.
whenever im alone, im always thinking of stuffs.
my r/s, my frens, my family and the list goes on..
I guess for now, i shd concentrate on sth i wanna archieve in life.
its like, ever since i finished studying.
im just wasting my time every day.
just workin and workin and enjoying life.
i have no purpose in life.
no aim in life.
i always mention i wanna archieve this or that.
but i never really worked hard towards it.
had a chat recently with a fren.
and he mentioned
"shdnt you have sth in mind you wanan work for ?"
"shdnt you keep yourself occupied den start imagining stuffs?"
"have you ever thought of going back to school ?"
it suddenly woke me up.
i have been wasting too much time.
and being like a koala bear. sticking to my bf almost 24/7
i bet he cant breath with my existent.
its time for me to change what i am now.
from being such a 24/7 gf to some1 that allows her bf to have some freedom.
from working aimlessly to nth to working to earn and study my nails stuffs.
from thinking so much about useless stuffs to some1 that thinks so much of her future.
i really hope i can keep all these in mind and start planning out my future.
Im no longer a kid. Am turning 21 next year.
shd start having an adult mindset.
and that in the near future i would save enough
- to open a business
- to be able to get married
- to have a family of my own.
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY
not to be looked down at.
yup. guess thats about it. cannot have a long list or i wont be able to keep it :x
woah. another long blog post.
guess this will happen if i dun blog often.
haha ! but who cares. i guess no 1 reads my blog also.
at least i have a place for me to rant about my stuffs (:
Loved ♥
♥ Thursday, June 10, 2010
I feel that i needed a place to rant sth.
it feels sucky to "think" that some1 is saying stuffs behind your back.
and its not easy to just ignore it.
i really admire those that can do it.
PPL usually say that whoever speaks behind your back are just jealous.
but i think those are just comforting words.
Guess this is life. just have to suck things up. ):
Loved ♥
♥ Tuesday, June 01, 2010
A little few photos to spice my blog.
wahahah :x
anyway these were taken last night.
had a surprised celebration for HuaLun.
and indeed he was surprised (:
glad everything went well.
cos we were really shocked when all of us were hiding and den Darryl just appeared
and went still talked to HuaLun.
we were all like... *sian ! why must it always be him.*
it seems that he always chut stunt :x
but still the Birthday boy. didnt figure it out.
haha !
and his birthday cake was simply DELICIOUS !
i wan my cake to be done from there too (:
Awfully Chocolate *hint hint*
First time i eat chocolate cake not creamy and not too chocolatey..
if you get wad i mean.
i love love the cake (:
photo session. and den head out for supper.
chit chat. laughed.and at 1.30am we all parted.
it was a nice gathering. (:
hope every1 had fun. cos i did.
with all those funny things said. i indeed laughed alot !
and guess the next time would be Thailand trip.
going with this group of ppl again.
Im praying that God would let me enjoy this little getaway (:
Loved ♥
To have a Happy Family